“I am looking for another position.” A client told me in a conversation that he planned to transfer or leave his job. I was surprised since he had seemed to be enjoying his work and his recent presentation to his company was positively received.
He was hurt and disappointed that his team members had not attended his company presentation. While some had wished him well and even said they looked forward to his presentation, they were not in the auditorium. My client assumed that his colleagues did not, in fact, support him. He was sad, hurt and felt disrespected. He wanted to leave as soon as possible.
He was aware of the OASIS Conversation process and after a few weeks of suffering, and some encouragement, he decided to have a conversation with a team member about the event. After all, he had little to lose since he would be leaving anyway.
He began, “I was surprised that most of the team did not show up for my presentation. I assume people are not comfortable with my leadership and I am disappointed.” His colleague was dumbfounded. In fact, the opposite was the case. On the day of my client’s presentation, there had been a bit of a crisis with their program, and all of his team had banded together to address it. They had not told their leader since they knew of his big presentation in front of the company and they did not want to disturb him. His colleagues had stayed behind and handled the issue. They listened to his talk virtually or viewed the video. No one thought to tell my client about the crisis since it had been diverted.
My client’s assumption that his team did not support him was absolutely wrong. He suffered for weeks and almost left his position. He was grateful that he had risked the conversation.
Notice your assumptions. What conversation can you risk engaging in?
“I believe we can change the world if we just start talking to one another again.”—Margaret Wheatley
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